In an unprecedented move of national supervision, the United States Central Intelligence Agency has announced they will begin a new program to combat terrorism, and ensure freedom for citizens for decades to come.

Effective immediately, a task force has been appointed to examine the personal cell phone calls and text messages of several FBI officials who currently oversee the now-well-accepted NSA surveillance of US civilians, with heightened scrutiny being given to emoji.

The CIA has asked for the public's help in identifying terror threats, and the organization released this chart early Thursday morning.

Yael Weiss, SuslO, Nataliya Kostenyukova/Thinkstock

*This post is satire. Because jokes are funnier when you have to explain them.........