Last year’s target was Baby It’s Cold Outside.  The liberals call the cheery show tune the date rape song.  In some cities radio stations were pressured to drop the music.  Then came the backlash.  Radio programmers learned most people aren’t politically correct anuses.  The song was placed back into rotation.

The writer insists an elf kills a toy bird.  The bird that swims but can’t fly.

The devil is relentless and simply went in search of a new target.  A couple of days ago I wrote about a snowflake traumatized by Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer.  Not so much the song but the classic TV special.  The woman claims the show is violent and homophobic.  Please pay no attention to the overarching narrative about redemption.

I chalked up her take to a delusion and not a new front in the War on Christmas.  Until I came across similar arguments from another bed wetter.  This is a link to the latest volley.  The writer insists an elf kills a toy bird.  The bird that swims but can’t fly.  The bird was one of the characters from the Island of Misfit Toys.  At the end of the show an elf drops the toy from the sky.

As a little boy I did believe in Santa Claus.  I didn’t believe toys were living creatures and I didn’t believe cartoons were reality.  When the dog and Foghorn Leghorn would clobber each other I knew it was make believe.  I wasn’t a schizophrenic.

The latest writer also tackles the Charlie Brown Thanksgiving program.  Because Woodstock eats some turkey. Both are birds, so therefore Woodstock is a cannibal.  Get it?  And the writer is just plain nuts!

Woodstock is also a cartoon and I’m not at all sure what type of bird.  In real life I’ve seen big birds sometimes attack smaller birds, so the writer also isn’t up to speed with science, which is what liberals worship from what I understand.  They’ve closed the churches and now they plan to wipe away all of our traditions.  Dangerous, dangerous people.